Do you know an abusive person? Probably. But the truth is, a person who is abusive toward others isn't always easy to identify, especially when you're in a relationship with one. Abusers can be caring, kind and charismatic when you first meet them. Unfortunately, these master manipulators know how to keep certain parts of themselves hidden from others. An abusive person will follow a pattern of behaviors that can give you a glimpse into who they really are. These behaviors are signals that it's time to leave, before things get worse.
Here are five behaviors an abusive person displays:
1. They Don't Abuse Everyone
Abusers don't abuse everyone. They choose their victims. An abuser will act like one person when you're around family and friends, then another person when the two of you are alone. If you are being abused in any way, but your partner is charming when it comes to your family members, friends or even strangers, don't make the mistake of thinking they aren't really an abuser.
2. They Don't Abuse All The Time
Many people who are in a relationship with an abuser stay because the relationship has up's and down's. If an abuser is mistreating you 40% of the time instead of 100% of the time, they are still an abuser, and they are still dangerous.3. They Are Controlling
Abusers seek control. They need it and they crave it and they'll do whatever it takes to get it. You may notice a controlling nature in any and every situation. They might insist on driving, picking out your clothes, choosing the restaurant you eat at or letting you know whether or not it's OK to go somewhere or talk to someone. If you notice a dangerous controlling streak in your partner, it's a red flag.
